Disappointing: No New War Criminals for Harrison Armory Mech Names

Lancers were disappointed to discover that in 2025 there were no new war criminals in the seat of the President of the United States for Harrison Armory to name one of their mechs after. Instead, there was an older, less shiny war criminal returning to office. Harrison Armory is well known for taking the names of generals, admirals, and warriors responsible for countless deaths to name their elite frame licenses. As of this article’s publication, the Armory has yet to base any of their designs after a woman from Earth’s blood-soaked history.

Gemma Lasseter of the colony New Albuquerque says that she was hoping for some sort of representation on the battlefield. “I guess I was naïve to think that by 2025 a woman would have had the chance to commit some war crimes of her own. I look forward to the day that I can rain down hell on my enemies in a femme-coded mech. Smith-Shimano’s Black Witch is fine, I guess, but their designs are too sleek. Now, if Northstar wants to give us an Anne Bonny frame, then I’ll be interested.”

When we asked Harrison Armory for a statement, they responded to our requests with a payload dropped from orbit, wiping out a small town. The press release within that payload confirmed Harrison Armory’s devotion to equity and representation in its product lines, but argued that the point was moot. “The fact of the matter is that Harrison Armory names its premier frames after warlords who were physically on the battlefield, who were not afraid to get their own hands bloody. Many historical figures may be nominally responsible for great acts of carnage and loss of life, but armchair warlords the likes of Bush, Obama, and Trump are generally used to name interrogation equipment, unmanned drones, or biological weapons.”