Solar Eclipse briefly sates RPG Designers’ desire to Blot out the Sun

While many North Americans were intrigued and delighted by Monday’s solar eclipse, RPG designers looked forward to it more than anyone else. The natural urge of those who create tabletop settings to tamper with celestial bodies is almost overpowering, and many gathered along the path of totality to watch as the sun was engulfed. When darkness fell, the crowds across America showed their appreciation. Morné Schaap held his arm out to show off his goosebumps. “It’s colder now, right? That’s not just me?” John Harper handed out snack packs of fried mushrooms. Tracy and Laura Hickman’s chosen spot in Iowa was reportedly cloudy, which they said they were fine with.

However, as it has every time before, the sun eventually reemerged, and daylight returned. Though most tried to hide it, it was clear that the various authors and creators were disappointed with the outcome. We asked Richard Pett of The Blight setting about this, and he just shook his head. “There’s only so many opportunities that we get get for the sun to be swallowed by something unimaginably large. I think we all have this hope, no matter how small, that it will bring something new and exciting to the humdrum world we call home. Things like the portals to hell opening up, or the dead rising again, or giant ghost whales floating into our skies. That would be fun.”

Studies have shown that RPG Designers are over ten times more likely to wish that the sun would explode, fizzle out, or be drained, than any other demographic. Dr. Ryan Jacques, a psycho-astronomy researcher at UC-Berkeley, says that early theories have proven problematic. “There was the initial stigma of Dungeons & Dragons, of course, believing that all players, and by extension, its creators, were basement-dwelling troglodytes who could not bear the sight of the sun. While that outdated thinking has finally started to lose ground, we haven’t yet found a satisfactory answer. Our only solace is that there exists no technology that these people could get their hands on to blot out the sun and sink the land into eternal darkness. While the concept may be ‘sick,’ or ‘metal,’ the truth of ever-sinking temperatures would not be fun, I assure you.”