Health officials urge Goblins to drink Health Potions Before they Die
Goblin Doctors are leading an initiative to make goblins drink their health potions sooner rather than later when they’re all dead. Dr. Likspit of John’s Hop Caves has conducted studies that suggest drinking health potions in the middle of a combat can extend goblin lives by at least a few turns, and even years if they actually win the battle. “We’re much more likely to be the first enemies a fledgling adventuring party is going to face, which is one of the few times we’re going to have a real shot at beating them. Using literally the one magic item at your disposal is tantamount to your survival.”
Dr. Likspit says that too many goblins wait when they have an injury, rather than seeking immediate medical assistance, often resorting to homemade tonics and surgery. While this can be attributed to the limited effectiveness of goblin medical services and healthcare system, that do-it-yourself attitude should not extend to the use of magical unguents and elixirs. “You’ve already got the cure to your bleeding stomach, you don’t have to screech wildly and bum rush the enemy. Take your free disengage and use it wisely. Or use it foolishly. Just use it, I’m begging you.” Dr. Likspit placed his head in his hands. “I just can’t see another body on my table, with no healing potion residue on their lips.”
Dr. Likspit is well aware that even if he is able to change public opinion, truly lengthening goblin lifespans depends on many other factors. “Drinking your health potions in the heat of battle is important for more than just your own wellbeing,” said Dr. Likspit. “If we’re being honest, you’re still probably going to die, so even if you feel like you’re not going to be able to get one last slash into them, at the very least you’re not giving the adventurers another tool in their belt before they finish us off in the caves.”
