Game Master Eyewitness unable to Directly Describe Anything that Happened
A crime may or may not have been committed today in downtown Boise, Idaho. We were alerted to the possible crime on our tip line by Adrian Swancar, local nurse and game master, where he indirectly hinted at what might have happened. According to Swancar, a somewhat suspicious man appeared to have taken off in another person’s vehicle. When we asked if the individual had actually stolen a car, Swancar responded that, “It certainly would appear that way, yes.”
Swancar’s description of the man was largely unhelpful, but is recorded here for posterity. “He was the kind of person that didn’t have any defining features, which is why I noticed him. They had the bearing of someone who bore years of hardship. Their coat was pretty common for what the locals around here wear. Maybe the owner of the nearby shop knows something.” When we asked what the shop’s name was, or what it sold, he muttered angrily something about “the usual goods.”
When we asked what had alerted Swancar to this possible crime, he said that he heard what sounded like glass breaking and stepped outside to see someone get into a vehicle that “matched the description of one of those hatchback sedans you’ve heard about. Then they took off.” No make or model was offered. We asked which way the suspected criminal had gone, Swancar replied, “there are tire tracks going every which way on this road,” so it was hard to tell.
As we recounted the lack of details back to Swancar for accuracy, he interrupted us to say that the person’s gender wasn’t clear. We pointed out that he himself had used male pronouns several times in his description. Swancar was quiet for a moment before saying, “Yeah, I guess I did already say that. Crap. I guess it’s not a big deal.” He then hung up. If anyone has any information on whether any of the implied events may have occurred, please contact us.